I am often asked the same questions by prospective pupils or their parents when they phone up for driving lessons. How much? How many lessons does it take to pass? What is your availability? I always try to find out their motivation for wanting to learn and usually it is to get freedom, although some times there is a need to pass a driving test yesterday!
The reasons are varied and I always tell them I’ll do what I can but, at the end of the day, it happens when it happens. I was called by a mother who was very glowing about her Son and was convinced he would take to it with ease as he was the head boy at a large City Grammar School and very clever. Everybody has a right to be proud of their children but I am usually required to “knock some sense into them” by their parents! She also claimed this would be good for me because it would lead to immense amounts of business for my Driving School. Anybody who knows me now is well aware that I never use desperate methods to get business, I have friends upstairs who seem to pull strings for me there.
I turned up for his first lesson and his Mother was polite but obviously quite pushy where her Son was concerned. Her Son was the complete opposite, very quiet and unassuming and a gentleman, although undoubtedly clever. We got on really well, which is usually the case. The early lessons went ok but he was struggling with basic things like steering, braking, the usual stuff, but it did take time to sort out. At the end of each lesson his Mother would interrogate me about what his next step was and how important it was to push ahead with a plan. I assured her this was the case but sometimes people only understand the language of shouting and banging fists on the desk, it’s how successful people are seen to behave. My laid back approach about training is to concentrate on the feelings of the pupil to guide me on where I need to work, rather than using a strict training regime – blame the modern “ticks in boxes” culture we have in our society for that, if you like. I always asked her to trust me, I know what I am doing.
We did have discussions about what car to buy for him to practice in, what he needs to work on and what the plans are but I could tell there was a difference of opinion in how he should be taught. She wanted him to be pushed hard and forced, while I could see he was developing really well without forcing things. In other words, he had an uncanny grasp of the universal flow without realizing it.
I was doing a driving lesson on a Saturday morning before I was due to go to them when I got a text from her. When we were parked in a safe place I read it and it stated that he couldn’t do his driving lesson today because he was tired. Could I do it later or re-arrange it? I texted back and said it would have to be paid for because of late cancellation as I didn’t have any other spaces. My phone rang! It was her! To say she was not pleased was an understatement.
She demanded I do the lesson later. I refused.
She demanded I do it tomorrow which was Sunday. I refused.
She demanded I did it on Monday. I was on holiday from Monday so I refused again.
She had been paying for her Son’s driving lessons and had paid for a number up front which was common practice, and she had one more lesson after this that was still paid for. I got a text later saying that I was to do the last lesson with him then that was the final one. I’ve seen this kind of behavior before where somebody of inflated ego thinks they own somebody because they have paid money for a service. I know my own value and will not be bullied like that but I did feel the bond I had with her Son was of greater value than any professional contract.
I turned up for the last lesson and I told him I had no bad feelings towards his Mother and would still be as professional as ever. The lesson was done in virtual silence but I could tell the episode had affected him. We parted on good terms and wished each other well, although I felt there was unfinished business with his driving.
A couple of weeks later I got a text from his mother demanding I give him his old time back from the next Saturday. It was a very blunt text with no please or thank you. I was able to move things around so I turned up to be met by the Son, no sign of his Mother. We got in the car and he explained to me that his Mother is only acting in what she sees as her best interests and he respects that but feels he needs to complete his driving. I agreed and he then told me that he was paying for his own driving lessons from now on as his Mother had refused to give him any more money and if her Son wanted to continue with me he would have to fund it himself. This was the biggest vote of confidence anybody could get from such a young person, a person who was wise many years ahead of his age. We continued and the mood got lighter. I never pushed him hard, he never pushed himself hard, yet we got to Driving Test standard in a short time after resuming the lessons.
I took him for his first test and he passed with flying colours. We drove back to his house in a calm and collected way and when we got there he went in to get the money to pay. I never saw his Mother again after our difference, whether she chose to stay away or not doesn’t matter.
When he returned I told him I do not hold any grudge against his Mother and to tell her I said, “Hello.” I then said to him, “There is a natural flow of energy in the Universe which, if you tap into it, will get you results in a seemingly effortless way, but if you fight it the road will be bumpy and difficult. You have natural Universal energy and should remember this for whatever you hope to achieve in your life.” He smiled in his all-knowing way and we parted on very good terms.
I would like to think that he had learnt to go with the flow of whatever energy is leading you to your goal and not to force it like his Mother had done.
What did I learn? Probably nothing that I did not already know but I got the privilege of watching the Universal flow in action thanks to two special teachers.
This story is not featured in the book but is typical of the experiences I have had whilst going through my spiritual awakening and training. There are similar stories in the book that taught me other lessons